Erica: Full-Spectrum Doula CLIENT
Sarah is an angel in my birth story, and a “fairy picnic girl” in my daughters’ experience of it. She is receptive, sensitive, attentive, and has a big strong heart. You can always feel the love in her cooking and in anything she brings to, or offers you. You can also always sense that she is giving what she is ready to give.
Her care always comes from a place of deep respect. For you, for herself, for the family, for humanity, and for the mystery that is birth and birth’s journey.
She has a light heart and is able to laugh with you through some of the obstacles that come along with births’ journey. She knows what is relatable and universal to motherhood, and that creates a feeling of comradery and understanding.
I have worked with another doula during birth as well, but my experiences with Sarah (during one postpartum period, and then a second birth + postpartum period) left nothing undone. I hold that experience in my heart as an honor to have lived, and to have received such care, and shared reverence, in a moment as big as we are.
…an excerpt from my birth story (a 2+ day labor for my third baby, a boy, who was 12 days “late”):
This is Day 2 of labor, Tuesday morning, having started contractions Sunday afternoon. I was 70% effaced and 4-5 cm dilated. The night before, back home after a day of labor, and only 3cm dilated, I was texting with Sarah, about fears of birth and dreading how exhausting it would be, and how I was dreading that “transition” moment when I might feel like I couldn’t do it.
She comforted me saying everyone experiences that, and I have been through it, and I will be able to do it again.
“10:30 am: our doula came to the birth center- serendipitously available today when we hadn’t committed to a contract. I wasn’t sure I needed her yet, but she offered to stay, and she had SO much perfect food… protein shake, smoothie, nettle hibiscus raspberry leaf tea with honey, coconut water, fresh cut grapes kiwi and mango, PBJ wrap and crackers and applesauce… soup… anything and everything.
She also had a plan for labor and was ready to coach. She was an angel and a leader. She was also a sensitive observer and a nurturing supporter to my own instincts.
She told me not to worry about manners, about accommodating her (that she promised to take care of herself today), and she told me it’s 100% ok to say no to anything she suggests and that I am the queen today and there is no offense taken during birth. She gave me mantras that kept me strong, and she said them at the right times, so focused attentive and in tune with my breaths.
“Go deep, move into it.. yes that’s it’s.. good breath.. this is you .. this is your power.., it’s not stronger than you… “
We went outside from about 11:30 until 2. My doula swiped away meeting notifications, because I missed a school meeting while laboring. Whatevs. Laboring OUTSIDE on a 77 degree day in October, amidst fall leaves, in fresh air….it was absolutely wonderful, grounding, enriching, life giving, natural and just right.
We leaned on a shoulder-height fence, peering into the lawn of someone I know for what felt like an hour. Then I leaned over a ball on the grass. The nurse came out and took pictures for their Instagram. Caption “this is community birth”. They said it was beautiful. It truly was. Honestly though my fashion left a LOT to be desired. Huge polka dot dress with PJ pants under it, and crocs on.
I sipped hibiscus raspberry nettle iced tea with honey, and nibbled cracker and PBJ wrap, fed to me so kindly, by Sarah. She so considerately thought of what I should eat, and when, to have my energy last me, and to stay hydrated. I was fed little bites or sips of goodness all thought out the labor.
Another woman showed up with her kids and aunt and had her baby before me. Left before me too.. her doula said “get it girl!” To me laboring on the ball in the grass. Nurse took my vitals on the ball at 1pm, Sunday told me transition is coming transition is coming. To me, I thought I was already in it… since about …whenever we started outside, so I wasn’t scared.
I could “handle with this”. My body, my baby. These contractions were deeper and like transition for Emma. But it lasted for like 2/3 hrs.
…Fast forward:
7:16 pm: Like always, that moment came amidst insane pushing where oh my gosh the relief and the squirming warm feeling of a full baby shooting out of there. And before I knew it, he was in my arms and I was crying hysterically. Saying to him “how did you do that??!” And Sarah said to me “you did that mama”.
I will never forget that moment or that exchange. She was holding me up. Not letting a moment pass during which the power of what I just did could be lost on me.
Of course, my husband realized not too long after the birth that Thai was still open, so he ordered food. Sarah went to pick it up and stayed a while and ate with us (she took her mask off and ate outside.. pandemic..) then came in and held baby for me while I ate.
And thankfully, because of Sarah’s diligence in feeding me like a queen the whole labor, I was already fed and hydrated throughout the long labor and delivery, so I felt strong, stable, present and thankful. Much different than after my last birth.
I had told Sarah weeks ago, how much I needed help hydrating and eating for this birth, and that I would want my doula to stay awhile after birth to make sure I’m okay… and she 100% listened to me and came through for me with flying colors.
…Reflecting on my birth team (homebirth midwife, Sunday; and doula, Sarah):
These people usher in big moments. They deal with real stuff, with big stuff. They witness it, don’t miss a beat or a breath and I can’t fathom how they do it so often. It’s all still a mystery to me, after three births, how a baby comes out of you, but I am in awe every time.
This time, I have to include the birth team and their huge hearts in my awe. And their postpartum care is also amazing: texts, photos of the birth, a home visit! … so much food, advice and support from our doula by text, in person, through drop off of food and drink. These people TRULY care and they RADICALLY care.
This is not a job to them. This is a calling.
I am so happy I allowed myself to feel the care they offer and to be their trusting patient. I am forever grateful for the experience and the safe and healthy birth they facilitated for our family, and I am in true admiration for what they do for our community, and what they provide.
Again, these are big moments, real moments, and they make space for them. They see them, they affirm their reality, and they help you live into them… pregnancy, birth, postpartum. I do feel supported, and I do feel respected, and I truly feel my baby was birthed with love and respect during every moment of birth and afterwards.
Sarah’s doula/coaching techniques are rooted in respect and faith in the body-
“this is your body, it’s not bigger than you, this is you, you are strong and soft and in it…” It was all beautiful.
Sarah sees birthing people. She really sees them, and with her heart, her efforts, her level headedness in listening and supporting during a birthing person’s time of extreme feelings and change, with all of her faculties … she is there for them. This is not just a job for her, this is a calling.
Thank you, Sarah, for giving in this way.
